Iced Borscht Defecates on Religion’s Buffet of Lies
Steve Crowder over at Big Hollywood calls atheism a mental handicap and asks atheists in the modemscape to respond.
S’okay. Here goes.
I won’t draw upon the excellent work of such provocative rapscallions as Sam Harrris, Richard Dawkins and Christopher Hitchens, fine gents who cover this territory much better than I ever could.
Instead, I’ll challenge religious folks to riddle me this:
If “Intelligent Design” is at work in the cosmos, are things on the list below part of our sexy creator’s swell plan?
I’m sorry to shit on the buffet, folks, but I tend to believe that most prophets and/or power-brokering transcendalists were:
A) full of shit;
B) high as a kite (it’s a good thing there was no drug war when Moses was smoking Sinai Peninsula Thunderfuck);
C) batshit insane; or
D) temporal-lobe epileptics.
My take on religion can be likened to a semi-obscure SEINFELD scene. Jerry’s date asks him in a perky manner: “You don’t like dancing?” and Jerry responds in an equally perky tone: “No! Because it’s so stupid!” Replace the word “dancing” with God, religion, spirituality, etc., and you have my take on matters of our Lord. (Note that I didn’t say people who believe in these things are stupid. I labeled the concepts stupid — an important distinction!)
I don’t disagree with conservatives’ opinion that many of the world’s most visible atheists are shrill dorks (hi Bill Maher, yes I see you back there telling 1987-caliber “white people are so lame!” jokes). But you can’t paint us all with the same tar brush. I myself am sympathetic to many a conservative cause, e.g. small government, less taxes, more guns, less Sean Penn, etc.
That said, let’s take the high road to end this thing. Some unity, coupled with levity. Here’s a relevant Neil Hamburger joke:
“Why did God invent so much gay porn?……………..Because he’s a fag.”
Thank you; you’re beautiful! Iced Borscht audiences are the greatest audiences in all the land!
