Bringing Home the Freshest Kill

Posts in the dog category

I’m out of ideas.

And something strange has happened to this blog that involves tons of crawlbots from China:


So, kind of a wasteland here lately.

I have things to write about but they are probably too personal.

I miss the hell out of this guy, who is no longer living with me, and that is a sad turn of events:

Good Friend

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My transformation into lunatic isolationist is complete.

Welcome to my fortress of rectitude. I’ve erected a new dog fence. No prayers dare enter this frightful maw.


Beware of Dog Sign

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View this pic.

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My dog is my favorite non-human animal on earth.

Whenever we arrive at the dog park, we are barbarians at the gates, restless to permeate the membranes of these verdant cocoons; eager to find tranquility and smoke it from its hole.

The dog is my fierce friend, my loyal companion. When I’m depressed, he energizes me with his playfulness. When I need to relax, he is a palm frond for my aching ass muscles.

Sometimes people try to “tame” the contrarian fires burning in my dog’s wolf-warrior soul. To slow this elegant engine of destruction from its march through neighbors’ backyards and their cat-litter boxes.

But, to paraphrase something the great Jim Goad once said, “Would you ask Usain Bolt not to sprint?

If someone ever tried to hurt my dog, the forecast would call for a torrent of fist-showers. My knuckles would rain hell on his assailant with the ferocity of a valkyrie carrying its freshest kill to Valhalla.

Cat owners, yours is no disgrace. I love cats too. I actually own one of them, with another on the way (I’m “cat-pregnant,” with an expected due date of Autumn 2013.)

But I admire the chaos and incivility that dogs bring to the table. Chaos sells, and my dog’s buying.

Fun tidbit: My ex-wife and I enjoy joint custody of the dog. When he’s not with me being awesome, he’s protecting her and my son from the city’s most ignoble scum.

He is the greatest canine I know.

x-posted at When Falls the Coliseum

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Click on images to follow through to user’s Flickr page.

Attack Dog

Thou shall be loved

Wolf x3

Call of The Wild

The Crossing

howling wolf II

With Wolves

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All photos by the lovely Jackie Baisa.

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A quick public service announcement:

I’m off to the high desert badlands for a few days to contemplate life among the pronghorn and coyotes.

Lest any burglars want to break into my Fortress of Ennoblement, let it be known that the palace is being guarded by a dog that bites and a house-sitter so intrepid that he once incurred the wrath of Christopher Hitchens in a public setting. (It’s true. Hitch lashed out at my house-sitter in a crowded theater one night, using words that only Hitchens uses e.g. prevaricative, splenetic, etc.)

Anyway, I’m excited, because when I get back, I’ll be publishing a guest post from one of my favorite authors.

Coming soon…

Deschutes National Forest


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